


the black spider, darling

by FcrestNymph



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Elf Fights, Exhibitionism, Frottage, M/M, Sex In A Cave
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-08
Updated: 2018-11-08
Packaged: 2019-08-20 12:25:51
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,606
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16555727
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FcrestNymph/pseuds/FcrestNymph
Summary: He felt a hand wrap around his wrist and yank, spinning him around quick enough to nearly dislocate his shoulder. Another hand slammed against his opposite shoulder, sending him stumbling backwards, his back smacking painfully into the rough cave wall. He sneered, eyes sparking with irritation.“You’re a cocky little thing, Taako dear.” Brian purred, leaning close. Taako turned his head away, his scowl never dropping. Brian’s breath ghosted over his ear and his shoulders tensed, his member stiffening. “I love that about you.”[[Elf Fights: An fight that quickly turns rough and sexual, a chance to get rid of an elf's excess energy and get off while doing it. Can be about a real complaint, a fake one, or just a bit of snark to purposely initiate the Elf Fight. Completely consensual.]]





	the black spider, darling

Taako had just shot a boss ass magic missile when time began to freeze. The attack itself was the first thing to slow, the crackling energy faltering. Then it was Magnus and Merle, who both stopped right where they were standing, Merle stuck halfway through blinking. (It looked hilarious, actually, as if Merle smoked a bit too much of his beloved plants).

By this time, Taako was quite familiar with what this was. He was not caught in the time spell, he never was.

“At least you didn’t interrupt my spell casting.” He said, glancing over to the right. Standing beside the handful of Bugbear enemies the Tres Horny Boys had been fighting, was a tall Drow, a dark elf.

“Oh, but it’s so fun to do zat,” Brian said with a lazy smile. He reached a hand up to stroke the fur on one of the Bugbears, and promptly made a disgusted face as his hand came back slightly dirty. It didn’t actually look any different, but he could  _ feel  _ the dirt. “Ugh, how unsanitary.”

“You’re the one who chooses to do this whole act in caves, my dude.” Taako said with a scowl, ears already pinning back. The dark elf’s smile widened, becoming a bit crooked, a bit sly. He sauntered up to Taako and reached a hand, brushing his fingertips across the man’s cheek.

Taako jerked back, lip curling in distaste. “Fuck off, I’m not in the mood.”

Brian let out a hum, eyeing the elf hungrily. Heat slowly began to fill Taako’s stomach, an expectant response. “I am, darling~”

Taako ducked out of the way, rolling his eyes and walking the opposite direction, towards one of the walls of the cave. “Then go fuck your little spider friends.”

He felt a hand wrap around his wrist and yank, spinning him around quick enough to nearly dislocate his shoulder. Another hand slammed against his opposite shoulder, sending him stumbling backwards, his back smacking painfully into the rough cave wall. He sneered, eyes sparking with irritation.

“You’re a cocky little thing, Taako dear.” Brian purred, leaning close. Taako turned his head away, his scowl never dropping. Brian’s breath ghosted over his ear and his shoulders tensed, his member stiffening. “I love that about you.”

He wasn’t expecting the lips against his ear, and his knees nearly buckled. He scoffed, having to swallow back the excited tremor that threatened to give him away. “More  _ cocky  _ than you could ever be.”

He was, though, expecting to be shoved harder against the wall, the rough rock digging into his back. He growled, arching his back and pushing against the Drow, their eyes locked defiantly, aggressively, possessively.

“Ooh~! You’re a bad little boy today, aren’t you?” Brian said with a grin. Taako could feel the change in his expression, the Drow’s lips still dangerously close to his ear, brushing gently against his cheekbone.

He pressed a knee between Taako’s legs, earning a growl in response. His body pushed forward, flush against the wizard, and he was promptly shoved backwards. He stumbled, caught himself, and looked up at Taako, red eyes wide in surprised amusement. Taako had only managed to get out half an insult before their bodies connected again and the wind was knocked out of him, just as lips crashed against his.

He placed his hands on Brian’s chest, half pushing him away and half tugging him closer, their lips already working feverishly against each other. Brian bit down on Taako’s lower lip, earning a groan in response, and Taako parted his lips.

The Drow’s tongue was pressing against Taako’s in an instant, exploring the mouth he already knew so well. Taako’s perfect teeth, straight and white (unlike Taako himself), his soft and warm tongue, the ridged roof of his mouth, the mouth that felt so good against him.

Taako raked his hands down Brian’s chest, no doubt leaving marks even through the thin, stylish black fabric of the Black Spider’s shirt. Brian rutted against him, already skillfully pulling his overly intricate pants down to his thighs. His hands moved forward, grabbing at Taako’s beautiful hips, long nails digging in.

Taako ground his hips forward, hands reaching up, scratching at Brian’s dark neck, up to his hair, where he tightened his grip and forcefully pulled the Drow closer. He felt his skirt be pushed up, out of the way, and he eagerly growled, ears nearly twitching with pure excitement. Brian wrapped his finger’s around the elf’s cock, grinning into the kiss as Taako unintentionally bucked his hips forward, a breathy gasp pushed between Brian’s lips.

Brian adjusted his position, breaking the kiss as he slid his hand up and down Taako’s cock, spreading the precum along his length. After one more moment to prep his own member, he pressed a kiss to Taako’s neck (easily accessible, now that Taako had thrown back his head at Brian’s stroking) and rocked his hips, pushing their cocks together, slick skin rubbing against each other, both elves moving their hips in an attempt to get  _ more _ , to get  _ closer _ .   
  


Taako felt oddly pleased by the fact that Magnus and Merle were less than twenty feet away, just frozen in time, no clue as to what was happening right in front of them. He bucked his hips as Brian jerked them both off, his slender hand around both of their cocks.

Brian kissed Taako’s neck and nipped the same spot, teeth grazing the elf’s delicate skin, and he sucked at it to get a needy moan from the man himself. Taako gasped and bit his lip, his head thrown back against the stone wall as he thrusted forward, rubbing against Brian’s cock, the Drow’s soft hand rhythmically stroking up and down both of their members, fingernails occasionally brushing against the sensitive flesh before being replaced with the more callused skin on Brian’s thumb pad.

“F-fuck--” Taako growled, a rumble in his throat as Brian continued sucking and biting at his neck, no doubt leaving love marks behind. What a fucking shit--

Brian groaned, hand jerking for a moment, rhythm interrupted as he came closer to climax. “Ah--Go on, love,” He said, accented voice dripping with lust. “Come for me, darling.”

Taako bit harder onto his lip, the pressure nearing its breaking point, and he continued shakily bucking his hips, grabbing tight to Brian’s hair, tugging and drawing pleasured moans from the Drow’s lips. He drew his hands away and wrapped his arms around Brian’s neck, tugging him somehow even closer, breathing hot and heavy in his ear, which flicked back and twitched, the sensitive body part responding without Brian’s intention.

One more stroke, two, and--

“A- _ Aah _ !” Taako all but screamed, tongue half lolling out his mouth as he came, splashing semen into Brian’s closed fist, onto the Drow’s cock, and Brian followed Taako’s lead soon after.

He gasped and bit harder onto Taako’s neck, his cock twitching as he climaxed, his seed mixing with Taako’s the sticky warmth coating his hand and slipping through his fingers, dripping lazily to the ground.

Taako made a whining sound and tilted his head, and Brian quickly noticed the amount of pressure he was using on Taako’s neck. He opened his jaw, letting go, and he snaked his tongue out to lick lovingly at the mark, a silent apology.

Taako buried his face in Brian’s long hair, catching his breath as he came down from his high. Brian recovered quicker, and he pulled away just a bit, as Taako’s arms were still hooked around his neck, keeping him close.

He let out a soft laugh and pressed a kiss to Taako’s lips, swallowing the lingering sounds of pleasure as he pulled his hand away. He got his intricate pants back in order within three seconds (a feat of god, if you asked him) and ducked out of Taako’s grip, shooting the dizzy elf a sly grin.

“See you next time, darling.” He said, his lips quirking farther upwards as Taako scrambled into motion, pushing his skirt down and fixing his crooked, half fallen off hat. Brian lifted a sticky hand in a wave, and spun on his heel.

The freezing spell vanished just as he did, and Taako was still brushing himself off when Magnus and Merle resumed their actions, both of them half stumbling (one verbally, and one physically) as they took in their surroundings.

It was only a fraction of a second to them, and they both looked over at Taako in surprise (who quickly tugged his overly large hat over his face), then back at the Bugbears they had been battling.

“Taako, the fuck--” Magnus blurted out. “Did you seriously just  _ transport  _ yourself?”

Merle scoffed, already pulling out his X-treme Teen Bible. “I cast  _ Zone-- _ ”

Taako wasn’t listening. After casting an illusion spell over himself to cover up the already bruising hickeys and bitemarks, he stepped nimbly away from the tiny puddle of semen on the cave ground. Neither of his teammates had noticed anything the last six times this happened (though Magnus had gotten suspicious a few times), but Taako wasn’t risking it. How would he explain this, anyways?

‘Oh yeah, remember Magic Brian? The Black Spider, the guy we killed way back when? Yeah, he’s alive, and we fuck during a third of the battles we have. Nothing to worry about, just forget I said anything.’ Yeah...No, that was  _ not  _ going to happen.

He might have considered putting a stop to it, but then he remembered that he was an absolute horny boy and it became a regular thing.

At least Brian was a sexy motherfucker, after all.

**Author's Note:**

> Absolutely stole the idea of Elf Fights from SilverServerError (well, I asked to use the idea, so not really stealing, but I want to feel evil!)
> 
> I'll definitely continue this and get more into the E.F.s, this was just something to get things rolling!
> 
> [Comments make me so hecking happy!]
> 
>  
> 
> [SSE's fic here! https://www.archiveofourown.org/works/13857033 ]


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